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Halloween Jokes Die Laughing Q: What do goblins and ghosts drink when they're hot and thirsty on Halloween? A: Ghoul-aid!!! Q: What is a Mummie's favorite type of music? A: Wrap!!!!! Q: Why do demons and ghouls hang out together? A: Because demons are a ghouls best friend! Warning: main(google-right.php) [function.main]: failed to open stream: No such file or directory in /sites/basestationzero.com/htdocs/halloween/jokes.html on line 77 Warning: main() [function.include]: Failed opening 'google-right.php' for inclusion (include_path='.:/usr/share/php:/usr/share/pear') in /sites/basestationzero.com/htdocs/halloween/jokes.html on line 77 Q: What do goblins and ghosts drink when they're hot and thirsty on Halloween? A: Ghoul-aid!!! Q: What is a Mummie's favorite type of music? A: Wrap!!!!! Q: Why do demons and ghouls hang out together? A: Because demons are a ghouls best friend! Q: What's a monster's favorite bean? A: A human bean. Q: What do you call a witch who lives at the beach? A: A sand-witch. Q: Where does a ghost go on Saturday night? A: Anywhere where he can boo-gie. Q: What did the skeleton say to the vampire? A: You suck. Q: What do ghosts say when something is really neat? A: Ghoul dude! Q: Why did the ghost go into the bar? A: For the Boos. Q: Why was the girl afraid of the vampire? A: He was all bite and no bark. Q: Why did the game warden arrest the ghost? A: He didn't have a haunting license. Q: Why didn't the skeleton dance at the party? A: He had no body to dance with. Q: Where does Count Dracula usually eat his lunch? A: At the casket-eriA: Q: What happens when a ghost gets lost in the fog? A: He is mist. Q: Where did the goblin throw the football? A: Over the ghoul line. Q: Why doesn't Dracula mind the doctor looking at his throat. A: Because of the coffin. Q: Why is a ghost such a messy eater? A: Because he is always a goblin. Q: What do you call a goblin who gets too close to a bonfire? A: A toasty ghosty. Q: Why did the Vampire read the Wall Street Journal? A: He heard it had great circulation. Q: What tops off a ghost's ice cream sundae? A: Whipped scream. Q: What do you give a skeleton for valentine's day? A: Bone-bones in a heart shaped box. Q: What are ghosts' favorite kind of streets? A: Dead ends Q: What is a vampires favorite holiday? A: Fangs-giving Q: What kind of makeup do ghosts wear? A: Mas-scare-A: Q: Why did the skeleton cross the road? A: To go to the body shop. Q: What happens when two vampires meet? A: It was love at first bite! Q: Who was the most famous ghost detective? A: Sherlock Moans. Q: What do you call two spiders that just got married? A: Newlywebbed Q: Who was the most famous witch detective? A: Warlock Holmes Q: What did the ghost say to the man at the coffee shop? A: Scream or sugar! Q: Who was the most famous skeleton detective? A: Sherlock Bones. Q: Who was the most famous French skeleton? A: Napoleon bone-apart Q: Which building does Dracula visit in New York? A: The Vampire State Building. Q: Where do most werewolves live? A: In howl-lywood, California Q: Where do most goblins live? A: In North and South ScarolinA: Q: Where does a ghost refuel his car? A: At a ghastly station. Q: What do Italian's eat on Halloween? A: Fettucinni Afraid-o Q: Why did the skeleton go disco dancing? A: To see the boogy man. Q: What do witches use in their hair? A: Scare-spray Q: What do you call a little monsters parents A: Mummy and deadly Q: What do you get when you cross a black cat with a lemon. A: A sour-puss Q: What do you get when you cross a pumpkin with a squash? A: A squashed pumpkin pie. Q: Why do ghosts shiver and moan? A: It's drafty under that sheet. Q: What instrument do skeleton play? A: The trom-bone. Q: What do ghosts eat for breakfast? A: Boo-Berries. Q: Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? A: He had no guts. Q: Why do vampires scare people? A: They are bored to death! Q: How can you tell a vampire likes baseball? A: Every night he turns into a bat. Q: What's it like to be kissed by a vampire? A: It's a pain in the neck. Q: How can you tell when a vampire has been in a bakery? A: All the jelly has been sucked out of the jelly doughnuts. Q: What songs does Dracula hate? A: "You Are My Sunshine" and "Sunshine on my Shoulders. Q: What did the Mummy movie director say when the final scene was done? A: Okay, that's a wrap. Q: How does a girl vampire flirt? A: She bats her eyes. Q: What is a vampires least favorite food? A: Steak Q: What's it called when a vampire has trouble with his house? A: A grave problem. Q: Why doesn't anybody like Dracula? A: He has a bat temper. Q: Why did Dracula go to the dentist? A: He had a fang-ache. Q: Why are vampires like false teeth? A: They all come out at night. Q: Who does Dracula get letters from? A: His fang club. Q: What kind of key does a skeleton use? A: A skeleton key. Q: What kind of gum do ghosts chew? A: Boo Boo Gum. Q: Why did Dracula take cold medicine? A: To stop his coffin. Q: Why does Dracula wear patent leather shoes? A: Sandals don't look good with his tuxedo. Q: How do you keep a monster from biting his nails? A: Give him screws. Q: What can't you give the headless horseman? A: A headache. Q: Why did the headless horseman go into business? A: He wanted to get ahead in life. Q: What is a ghosts favorite sale? A: A white sale. Q: What kind of tie does a ghost wear to a formal party? A: A boo-tie. Q: What's a ghosts favorite desert? A: Boo-berry pie. Q: What type of dog does every vampire have? A: Bloodhound! Q: What's a monsters favorite desert? A: I-Scream!! Q: When does a ghost have breakfast? A: In the moaning. Q: What do ghosts drink at breakfast? A: Coffee with scream and sugar. Q: Where does a ghost go on vacation? A: Mali-boo. Q: Where does a ghost go on Saturday night? A: Anywhere where he can boo-gie. Q: Where did the ghost get it's hair done? A: At the boo-ty shop. Q: What do they teach in witching school? A: Spelling. Q: Why does a witch ride a broom? A: Vacuum cleaners get stuck at the end of the cord. Q: What do you call a witch's garage? A: A broom closet. Q: What do you call two witches living together? A: Broom-mates. Q: Why don't mummies take vacations? A: They're afraid they'll relax and unwind. Q: What is a witch's favorite subject in school? A: Spelling Q: Why can't Boy Ghosts make babies?? A: Because they have Hollow-Weenies! Q: Why did the man with a knife in his head cross the street? A: He was dying to get to the other side!! Q: Where do ghosts go out? A: Where they can get boooooo-ze. Q: Where do ghosts go out? A: Where they can get sheet-faced. Q: What did the mother ghost say to her kids in the car? A: Fasten your sheet belts. Q: Why didn't the skeleton go to see a scary movie? A: He didn't have the guts. Q: What did the corpse' mom do when her son was bad? A: Ground him Q: Why was the mummy so tense? A: Because he was all wound up. Q: Why did the vampire need mouthwash? A: Because he had bat breath. Q: Why don't ghost have bands? A: They get booooooooooed. Q: What do you call a monster who poisons corn flakes? A: A cereal killer. Q: Who are some of the werewolves cousins? A: The whatwolves, the whowolves and the when wolves. Q: What did the bird say on Halloween? A: Trick or tweet! Q: Why do skeletons drink milk? A: To help their bones! Q: What's a Vampire's least favourite song? A: Another one bites the dust! Q: What is a Skeleton's favorite song. A: Bad to the Bone Q: Whats a ghost's favorite type of car? A: A boo-ick Q: Where do ghost go for fun? A: To the boo-vies Q: What's a skeletons favorite part of the house? A: The living room Q: What did the teenage witch ask her mother on Halloween? A: Can I have the keys to the broom tonight. Q: Why do ghosts like to ride elevators? A: It raises their spirits. Q: Why can't a Skeleton lift weights? A: He's all bone & no muscle. Q: What is a vampire's favorite fruit? A: A neck-tarine Q: What do the skeletons say be for eating? A: Bone appetite Q: What do gosts call there girl friends? A: There ghoul friends. Q: How did the ghost say goodbye to the vampire? A: So long sucker! Q: What did the goblin say to the witch? A: I don't know you tell me! Q: Why didn't the skeleton go to the Halloween party? A: Because he had no body to go with. Q: What is a ghost's favorite band? A: The Boos Brothers Q: What did Dracula have for dessert? A: Whine & Ice scream Q: What is Dracula's favorite restaurant? A: Murder King Q: What is a Ghost's favorite food? A: HamBoogers Q: What is in a ghost's nose? A: Boogers Q: What was the mummies' vacation like? A: Nobody knows. They were too wrapped up to tell us. Q: What did the boy ghost say to the girl ghost? A: You are the most booooooooo-tiful thing I have ever seen! Q: Why does a cemetery have to keep a fence around it? A: Because people are dying to get in. Q: What do you give to a pumpkin who is trying to quit smoking? A: A pumpkin patch!!! Q: Where do vampires keep their money? A: The blood bank!!! Q: Who are some of the were-wolves cousins? A: The what-wolves and when-wolves. Q: What did Dracula say after reading all these jokes? A: They suck! (or they bite!) Warning: main(google-bottom.php) [function.main]: failed to open stream: No such file or directory in /sites/basestationzero.com/htdocs/halloween/jokes.html on line 463 Warning: main() [function.include]: Failed opening 'google-bottom.php' for inclusion (include_path='.:/usr/share/php:/usr/share/pear') in /sites/basestationzero.com/htdocs/halloween/jokes.html on line 463 |